Hot Stuffs!

Had my exam again this morning at 9am. Freaking early and considering the fact that I had little sleep the previous night! It's no surprise that my eyes are damn red and dark circles already appeared during these past few days. Got to get back in shape before Christmas. Yeah I'll be in KL soon and then flying to Dubai for holidays with the folks.

I've been browsing the net at school since TM at home ain't got no connection at all. Serious, I'm getting mad. Anyway, I was looking around the folders and I stumbled upon some hot materials! Straight porn in school! I just opened the folder and quickly closed it. Curiosity kills.

Fall from grace

Quite a few things happened since my last post:

1) JK is back from Penang. He went on a business trip for 2 days and brought a few presents back. Yeah I now have Charmed season 1 to 6 unfortunately season 7 and 8 are not available on DVD yet! Guess I'll catch it on NTV7. He bought these DVDs in the night market. I think it's the Stanley Market. Same with the one in Hong Kong. I prefer the one in Penang, it is bigger and has much more goodies.

2) I twisted my leg, fell from 2nd floor and rolled all the way down! Dear Lord, I'm so thankful I'm still alive... Went to the clinic for a quick check up. Hopefully, everything is ok. My right foot is a bit swollen and kinda painful. JK has been taking care of me since my fall. Since then, I didn't even touch my books and care to study for my exams on Tuesday! I'm being such a drama queen right now.

3) My Law paper was an absolute mess! Scribbles and bad handwriting on most of the answer pages. It wasn't my fault! It was freezing inside the exam hall and I wrote about 12 freaking pages of nonsense. -Pfoof- 2 more exams to go.

So Far...

I've read a lot of books and still reading. My bookshelf is full of dusty books. I think after my exams I'm going to do a bit of cleaning. Books always keep me company. These are just a few that I can remember so far:

1. CSI [crime scene investigation] by Max Allan Collins
2. Comptesse de segur
3. Sydney Sheldon - I have the whole collection back in KL
4. Danielle Steel - I have the whole collection back in KL
5. Nicholas Spark
6. Christopher Pike - I have the whole collection back in KL
7. Dan Brown - Read all of them - Deception point was my favourite.
8. Wide Sargasso Sea by Jean Rhys
9. The guide by Narayan
10. Vipere au Poing by Hervé Bazin
11. Harry Potter by Jk Rowlings
12. Cuisine Sanglante by Minette Walters
13. The power of positive thinking by Norman Vincent Peale
14. The Rule of Four by Ian Caldwell & Dustin Thomason
15. The Devil Wears Prada - Lauren Weisberger
16. The deerslayer by James Fenimore Cooper
17. Animal farm by George Orwell
18. Mill on the Floss by George Eliott
19 Tartuffe by Moliere
20. Un Sac De Bille
21. Chance by Joseph Conrad
22. Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
23. William Shakespeare

I don't know how many times I've canceled dates and nights out with friends just to finish my books. I'm always walking around in Popular, MPH, and Borders looking for interesting reads.



Quote of the day:

“Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option”

Way to go

Exam was ok. I'm kinda confident that I'll score max marks in that paper. So back to JK, although he usually buys the TOTO, I think he spends too much on these bets! Sometimes up to RM300 just to play TOTO! That's a lot for me. I have no idea why he plays these lucky draws. Anyway, after yesterday's argument I stopped bothering him with all my questions. RM8000! I want a new laptop...hehe my actual IBM laptop is on the verge of dying! Considering an Apple MacBook Pro. But hey I don't have the money! Guess I'll have to stay with my old and faithful IBM until the end...and stop dreaming. Thinking of how to get back my money...

1) Impossile to ask the parents
2) JK is out of the picture as well
3) My current part time job pay is only RM600. That's not even enough for me to live...haha
4) Thinking of leading a double life: cute college guy daytime / fast and furious street car racer at night! That's pretty exciting...and i get to race with hunky guys but JK wouldn't approve.-Sigh-



Have to go back to my books for the Law paper on Friday. 3 more exams to go before the semester break. I can't wait to go back to KL...meet my old friends.

Back to work!

Gambling/Money: The Root of All Evil

Tomorrow, I’ll have my first exam but hey I’m not nervous at all. I know I will be able to score good marks in this paper. But after this, my nightmare will come true. Law paper…oh totally freaks me out! However after my revision session today, JK picked me up and he was acting rather weird. I kept talking to him but he didn’t reply any of my questions. I guessed he was in a bad mood; which he was when he later on told me. He needed money. I learnt a side of him that I didn’t know before. He’s been gambling and he owes RM8000. I don’t know on what he bet or gambled because he didn’t want to tell me. But WTF! OMG! He knew that I have half or the money and asked me if I could withdraw the money for him. “Sure…whatever it takes! But I hope it’s the last time!”

So we went to the bank and I withdrew RM4500 from my account! After that I’m completely broke. No money…. I’m totally depending on him to live now. How about Christmas and New Year and I was supposed to go back to KL and buy presents for my brother and little cousins. I don’t want to disappoint them.

Angry/Un-fucking-Believable!

There’s this new guy in JK’s life now! Oh god, it’s not that I’m jealous but I feel that I’m like invisible man. Whenever JK is with his straight friends, he totally ignores me. This guy is just an acquaintance he met on one particular day and the next day they were like the bestest friends ever! His name is Justin and he is in the same uni as me. It’s like I’m being spied on. I need my own space. He such a pain in the arse! I don’t like him. He always go around with JK and follow him like a lil’ dog. The way Justin and his friends sometimes talk to me is very rude and I feel offended by those comments. JK always laughs and seems like he is having the best time ever. I'm more close to his other friends Charles and Fiona (yeah they are a happy couple) JK, Charles and me were having lunch together when Justin came. Oh God! Why does he have to be there? Charles had to go back to work and I had to come to uni as well. JK didn’t look like he wanted to bring back so Charles proposed to bring me to uni on his way back to work. I was a bit surprised and at the same time pissed off and angry that my dear bf didn’t want to bring me back to uni. I don’t know what they did or where they went. I’m going to see them again later on… so what’s next?

Snake/Bats/turtle anyone?

I moved to Borneo beginning of the year just to be with JK. It that's is not LOVE I don't know what it is! So far I've eaten:
1. Bats - pretty hard to eat.
2. wild pigs - taste like normal pork.
3. Turtle - uhmm poor little thing.
4. Squirrels - i don't like.
5. Snakes - ok!
It's kinda weird for me but most of the time I didn't know what I was really eating. If I asked JK, he'd just say it's chicken or pork. I swear...snake when it is cooked with sauce and ginger and so on, it tastes just like chicken! But when I knew that it was a python, I almost puke in my plate! That was so repulsive and disgusting... I hate snakes! Just picture it alive in front of you in the plate!!! -OMG- Those jungle people! JK just wanted me to try ou these local delicacies. That will be the first and the last time for me. Honestly, hmm no thanks.

Blogs and Life.

Whenever I read blogs from other bloggers, I just can't compare my life with others and you know what? It looks that my life is pretty unexciting. Tell you the truth: What else ever happen in Kuching? It's everytime the same people around, and same places. Things were way different in KL. I had so much friends and fun.
It's been over a year since I'm living with my boyfriend. Being gay doesn't help at all. I'm out to my in-laws only. It's pretty frustrating. I don't really have any friends in Kuching except from my uni mates. JK, my boyfriend is adorable. Can't be even more lucky. But I'm starting to feel depressed. JK has his own friends. Pretty close but he is not out to them. Everything is under tight seal and talking about it, is a NO-NO. He is the most straight fucking gay I've ever seen. But when we are back home that's different. He'll put himself at ease and even watch America's Next Top Model or Project Runway and Desperate Housewives! Hey that's because I forced him to watch. Hehe... He needs some culture. But since I force him to watch my favorite shows, I'm also forced to watch tennis and any shows relating to cars. That's his hobbies. Gosh...sometimes it's just a pain in the arse!

About Love

"You are you and I am me. You do your thing and I'll do mine, and if we end up together in the end, then it's beautiful."

I fell in love with a straight guy! I was such in awe with him...Cute, smart, great sense of humor and an animal lover...B. was the guy of my dreams. Though a few years younger than me, he was mature and very much a close friend of mine. I came to know B. through his brother K., K. and I were doing our degree together and eventually introduced us. We bonded quite fast..Always had a blast in the pasties with him but alas, he was attached to a total beotch...that girl was fierce! Never mess with her...haha. But very pretty though. B. and his girlfriend were dating for like 2 years and I never came out to him. Its not that easy trying to tell the guy I had a crush on him.

Beotch, B., and Me at a party

Well one day, taking all the courage I finally told him that I was gay and that I like him..he was shocked I guess but quite ok with it at first. Then he began to distance himself from me and try to avoid me..that is when I went up to him and asked him what was wrong. He told me that he told his girlfriend and that the beotch told him to stay away from me...what’s wrong with her? If he’s ok having me as a friend, where your problem???

Anyway I guess also, he was on the verge of getting engaged..so maybe that’s why..i’ve lost contact with him and moved to Miri to do my masters..totally sucks..

Single again and looking! wait up...I met a guy named JK...looking good..spent a day at the movies with him yesterday and well all seems to be doing ok...until then...

See ya...